If I had a dime for every time something bad has happened to me and when someone has tried to comfort me with the words,
“Everything happens for a reason.”
Well I wouldn’t be here blogging now would I? I would be on some tropical island living it up in my own filthy riches.
There seems to be an unuttered perception in the world, a consensus that the expected response to this half-witted cliché is to nod my head earnestly, as if I’m considering something deep and philosophical, then smile and say,
“Why thanks! You are absolutely correct.”
Quite frankly, when one has failed to keep a relationship going long enough, or how people won’t leave you alone when you want to be left alone, or how you want someone but can’t have, or try to keep a steady job, or to get another bill from a collection agency, or wake up only to be disappointed that you did not in fact pay a bill so that is why you are in collections, I am not at all responsible for any positive responses to such understatements.
The “everything happens for a reason” idiom is a perfect example of something that people accept and distribute without even really understanding it, let alone question it.
There is no pattern, no consistency, and there is no evidence that anything equals out over time. Although I do tend to notice groupings of good or bad things happen to me, a lot. These sequences of fortune and misfortune that come about are as random as it can possibly get. There isn’t really anything I can do to control it. Or is there? If you have solution, please give me a call.
I don’t think I have ever met anyone who believed that every experience that happens is good overall. Maybe I’m just hanging out with Negative Nancy too much.
Oh and this “everything happens for a reason” amounts to nothing more than “every cloud has a sliver lining”. Pretty much the same thing if you think about it. However, despite my nonsense blogging, I am happy for every good experience and bad experience that has ever happened to me. I never regreted anything because if I did, I would not be the strong person I am today.
I endth this with some words of advice:
No matter how bad things are overall, there is always at least one positive element that can be taken from that situation, however small or insignificant it is in context with the larger picture. If one wants to find something good in a bad situation, that person will.
It does not matter if you are a good or bad person. Good things happen to good and bad people, just as bad things happen to good and bad people.
Don’t go looking for that needle of hope in a haystack of despair. Just face the bad things that happen to you as they are, you will feel stronger for it once you have overcome them.
Why not accept that bad things happen instead of trying to cover everything up with a plastic smile? Do everything in your ability to repair the damage, and then truly enjoy the good things in your life in all their undiluted splendor.
